a day to reflect

Yesterday, my maternal grandmother Felicidad Evangelista Mainit passed away from a sickness. She will be tested for COVID when she is embalmed, and for these next 9 days she will be held in vigil. She joins my grandfather, Victoriano, her three sons, and her granddaughter Lhordgen.
She was a kind, sweet, beautiful, darling of a woman, and she will be dearly missed by all who knew her. She had eight children in her life, and many grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I will try to find out how many to be exact. The reason I don’t know, is because there is a language barrier and that side of the family resides in the Philippines. However, a couple weeks ago I decided to switch my Rosetta Stone app to Tagalog and start learning, and boy; it’s a lot easier than Japanese.
The sadder part of me echoes, “Too little, too late.” & goes on to remind me that I skipped out on my opportunity to go to the Philippines when I had the money before COVID because I never got around to getting my passport reissued. Remembering to do things is a constant struggle with schizophrenia. If it’s not a habit, or have an alarm set for it, it’s a tossup if I’ll remember.

C’mon, self. That’s no way to reflect. That may be true but that’s not honoring her memory. Just be grateful she had access to FaceTime in her family over there for the memories you do have because of how hard it is to remember as far back as 1998 and 1987.

Victoriano and Felicidad

My last definite memory of Felicidad was of her 91st birthday party, which I got to observe via FaceTime. It was such a grand feast, and a great cake, but I remember her having trouble blowing out the candles.
15 minutes later
I talked to my aunt Lily on Facebook and got some photos from the party.

Big, Happy Mainit Family

I have a foggy memory of a video chat with her since then, and it’s of her being outside the house along with the man on the left in the picture above, Victoriano Mainit Jr.


I continue to be grateful that my dad is alive despite all the things his body is going through; is able to communicate, and earn a living. I thank God he has friends who are there for him so that he can get by without a caregiver.

Jeremy is coming to visit in mid-February. Woooo!

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